What were you going on about two days ago? So what changes are you going to make to yourself? I asked myself those questions on Monday. Truth is, i didnt know. Though what i did know; i was very disappointed. The promotion list came out Monday evening. With 22 months of experience, i was actually in a good shape to get promoted, well so i thought. Looking at the sparsely populated list, i spotted a friend that had join me on the same day, got seconded to another department and never looked back. He got promoted while i looking like an arsehole for staying behind, stayed behind.
Now i cant just blame the whole world and not myself. Yes, i am angry at myself for probably not trying any harder, but given the circumstances of my team, that was really the best they pushed me. Another friend, i saw her get promoted twice in the span of my stay.
Only one word, sick and why in the world did i not get promoted? It is a sign that there is better things in life for me?
Since Monday, i toyed with the idea of resigning. The day that i can throw the letter and say "Good Bye, i dont want to do any of the shit i am doing now". I finally brushed up my resume to reflect myself and not the young innocent 20 year old i was two years ago.
I guess i did learn alot about myself in the 22 months. I knew that talking is my forte and given the chance to do a presentation and i probably could be on par with others. Then again, it shows i ooze confidence, well maybe too much i guess.
I am frantically trying to put in my resume into any Tom, Dick and Harry vacancy at the moment. Plans to do photography and writing has come to mind. Maybe teaching people how to public speak as well, who knows? Fingers crossd, i have dated the letter for Monday.
Maybe i am a spoilt brat for losing a battle so easily or i am a sore loser. Though i still think its a battle i dont want to fight no longer. I dont want to go in to my boss room and ask why because the milk is spoilt and there should be no way of turning it around. All i know is, i think i had enough of my current job.
Sigh, how i wish i could do this everyday..make this..