Friday, August 17, 2007

Procrastination Time..

Its the time of the period again, when i want to just sigh about life before the next person is about to comment how good my life is and starts comparing me to the skeletons wrapped with skin in Africa starving.

Recently i developed the symptom of not knowing where to pursue my career and in life. I always had the intention to try my luck in Australia but i know i am not done with Malaysia just yet, until at least until next year. I assured that where i am now, is the best place that Malaysia can offer me until it is time to say goodbye. Apparently, no was the easy answer.

Plenty of options are available at my finger tip and for once, i can actually go into a totally new field and move to my next phase of life. Since i am not exactly very happy with where i am right now, isnt this the best opportunity for once to try something that i might be brilliantly good at? But the most important question is am i ready to go on to the next phase knowing another phase of life is just around the corner?

So i thought i might explore why i am not happy around where i am. As an associate consultant, i expect to be treated like one, that is i will do the work and learn my technical stuff. Identifying and selling the firm's services, should not be my problem but the managers. Unfortunately the problem with every single firm, when the order to get more billing comes down from the Big Boss to the small bosses (managers) and the small bosses cant perform, we small fries are like the targets for shooting. In my opinion, i feel that is bull shit. Not only that i feel my team doesnt have the urge to push forward. Every year, promises and targets are made, every year i see them where they are, at the same place doing the same thing. I was told at the start of the year, the team will expand double the size by end of the year, i see no change and its already August coming into September. You think i am stupid ar? 3 months and you want to appoint 7 staff, you got to be kidding me please.

It seems then, there should not be a problem why i should leave in a split second. I wish i could.

My paper is on the 4 September and hopefully after that i can really decide whether i want to stay or leave for good. Where should i go i ponder? Should i apply for the investment banking job that my friend has always been talking about? Or a cool food writer job? Or back in the firm with a different scope i.e. Advisory? Audit? I wonder i wonder..

It will be sad though, i have made friends with my big boss and some of my seniors in my team, colleagues from every other department and even the admin people as well..Imagine trying to make friends with another new group very well knowing you might quit 9 months-12 months from the day you join..kind of crap isnt?

Dilemma eh? Why is life so complicated i wonder..For now..my study should be the most important..and i m feeling kind of hyped up for it..lets study !!

20 comments:

MeiyeN said...

you seems to be undecided and confused huh? come on.. it's weekend! cheers and have a good one yeah! hope that everything will be alright for you soon :)

zewt said...

try corporate tax man. indirect tax is too specialised. it's still not too late to change.

hahaha... small fries always the place to put the shit la... u think those managers will take the blame meh.

Ginger said...

hmm.. as i am not in your shoes, i do not know what is the best for you and all.. but then if you are not happy with ur current job and u feel that you are going nowhere, i dont see why you cant change your job ,seeing that you are still young rite..

all the best!

Anonymous said...

Dude, move to assurance. Spend there 5-6yrs then move out. Trust me, cant go wrong one.

Iva said...

Eventually you will figure things out...but yea if you move to aust, that will be a whole new section about food there...hehehe

SuLee said...

that phase of life eh? sighh i hear ya, we are kinda in the same boat but not quit....

dont rush into things, take your time to think them real through.

take it easy

SuLee said...

not quit = not quite

ling239 said...

guess you are in the comfort zone yet not being comfortable enuff due to some reasons... any way stay focus for 4 Sept i am sure all will work out fine the way u want it.
all the best to u ~ cheers ^_^

"Joe" who is constantly craving said...

mei yen: weekend coming to an end.. boo..yeap i m suffering from a bit of a confusion stage..

zewt: true..its seriously abit too narrow for such a young person..i m still thinking about it..

ginger: thanks mate!

anon: i know its a faultess move..might want to go aust and start that path..

iva: hahah yeah..unfortunately it will be all aussie grub by then..

sulee: its a crap stage isnt? haha
hows ur wedding plans going?

ling239: thanks alot thanks alot

Jun said...

eh, wat paper u sitting for? i thought ur studying days were over! ;p

"Joe" who is constantly craving said...

jun: i still got my CA papers..still got a long way to go...haha..who say doctors are the only ones who has to study forever..

The Cooking Ninja said...

I just got my degree, thinking of doing my masters but decided to put it on hold for the next few years. This time round, I'm studying for my own personal pleasure rather than doing it for paper chase. It's a whole lot of difference experience.

Take your time to decide which path you want to go. That said, every new job is the same after a while.

Kok said...

joe,
Do what you feel is good! :P

Coketai said...

You have my sympathy and moral support but believe me, only YOU and only YOU are the one whose can decide on what you want to do but you have one scare resources i.e TIME!!! so make a decision and move on!!

LY.Tai

"Joe" who is constantly craving said...

cooking ninja: thanks for the tips..it is indeed not as easy as i thought it was..

kok: blog full time? anyone wants to hire me for that?

tai: thanks! fortunately i have abit of time to spare..

Cirnelle said...

Zewt says do corporate tax. I say, stay in indirect tax. Once you've made consultant, ask your big boss for a secondment to Sydney for GST familiarisation. Then, decide.

"Joe" who is constantly craving said...

cirnelle: argh! torn between parties eh? im sure u know my boss is a guy to learn stuff from eh? the problem is i want a secondment or just the opportunity to go there now..whereas he says if i shud stay till after implementation b4 we see..but thats abit too long and i will b stuck in a career that i dunno if i will enjoy..

Cirnelle said...

Well, you can't be 'enjoying' a job while thinking you don't know if you're 'enjoying' it now... gosh! I can really talk a load of crap at night. But at 1.5 years, it is a bit too rash a decision to make, since you'd probably still feel unchallenged by being an AC, you'd much rather do SAC or C jobs and get those grey matter a'stewing.

The thing is, if I'm not mistaken, only a C is entitled to be seconded over where you are... and in tax, those are few and far between. One person's been sent to London recently. That would mean it's at least another 2 years before the next one. Just nice for you, no?

P.S. Investment banking ain't what its cracked up to be.

Kok said...

joe,
blog full time means you're the boss. No need people hire one. hehe.

"Joe" who is constantly craving said...

cirnelle: hahah its all good..it just gives me another point of view..

i dont plan to get seconded..got a aussie PR..just apply direct ;).. btw just met ur niece/cousin? still tryin to figure out ur identity haha..

kok: then hope that wish come true..be a boss..